uncle jr

today i found out that my uncle jr died. it is so bittersweet. while i didn't know him that well, my memories of him are heroic. he always seemed to have a smile on his face, despite all his suffering. for DECADES he suffered from the effects of severe MS. he was wheelchair bound for at least the last 20 yrs of his life. but it is my understanding that his life was a sacrifice for his family. and that is the essence of true love. :) may he skip a 1000 ropes in heaven today. :)

christmas

i know it's not me....everyone i talk to seems to be struggling financially. so why do we feel guilty bcs we have to cut back on Christmas?? whatever happened to the Christmases when i grew up and we never got what was on our list bcs that was a "wish" list anyway? not a shopping list!! my childhood Christmases were so full of  JOY, serious joy, not the kind of joy that cleans grease off of hands but the kind that makes the angels SING! and i doubt my parents ever spent more than their normal budget. we just had FUN. we baked and sang (played noels all december!) and made and snuck and hid and did all kinds of fun thigns. and the morning of? we were all surprised and tickled and delighted by what we got. it was magical. we played games and stayed in our pajamas until late. sometimes we would carol on that day, usually the day before. we snarfed on homemade goodies and just had fun being together.
nowadays kids aren't satisfied....if they have a cell phone, it doesn't have all the newest features. if they have an ipod, it's not the current model. if they have a computer, it's not fast enough. an ipad? not enough memory. video game systems have replaced board/table top games and virtual icons have replaced real people. and kids now equate their parents' love with the amount that is spent on the gift.
which brings up another curious question, since when do kids need to know what their gifts even cost??

this year is going to be different. we are simplifying things. Christmas will be about memories, love and fun.  oh, and giving. :)   we're all poor. no one to compete with anymore.  let's remember the Reason for the Season.....

just thinking....

i've been thinking a lot about accountability and i have a few questions.... if we do the best we can, meaning that our intentions are pure and we THINK that we're making the best choices, but it turns out to not be the best choice, are we accountable? are we to blame? for example, i really thought that having a father in my son's life would be the best thing. i didn't know how disastrous it would be to have a BAD father, or even how bad it was until i got out of it. i  made the choice to marry, so it was MY decision. i even made the choice to stay.  bcs of some of the things that happened, this particular son learned a lot abt hypocrisy first-hand. and it changed him. in a bad way. he lost his innocence in a way. sooooo.... who's accountable? obviously the husband who was the meanie, but what abt me? i chose the meanie...

that's all. it was just a thought. maybe later/tomorrow/next wk i'll have more entertaining thoughts, but for now, that's it....

heroes

i just posted that blog on the doggy present when the thought occurred to me.... i could not have picked up that nasty carcass and disposed of it by myself. truth be told, i was walking around screaming "oh my heck!!" in sheer pandemonium. i paced up and down the hallway and couldn't even LOOK in the direction of that dead thing. but THANK HEAVENS for LITTLE BOYS. :) taylor is my hero... he  bagged that thing and dumped it in the garbage. but then i got to thinkin'....how many times my boys rescued me from moths, mice, spiders, even the goat(i'll save that one for another time).... if i'd had daughters, eric would have come home today to me AND tayloretta screaming in the hallway and a bird funeral still on the living room floor.

yes, Thank Heavens for little boys. :)

dog surprises

i was just relaxing on the couch, contemplating the feelings i had at the veterans' day assembly and feeling really humble. i heard the "pitter-patter" of little feet and looked up to see our sweet daydra. she's our crazynaughtybutlovable mini-dachsund/pug mix. she was chewing on something. taylor sd, "mom! daydra has something in her mouth! i think it's a chicken head" ....WHAT? we don't have any chickens! so i went back to my "zoning mood". "MOM! i'm SERIOUS! she has something she's not supposed to have" ....so i told daydra "SPIT IT OUT NOW!" and laying at her feet was a flattened baby bird's head, beak and all. OH MY HECK. i don't think i've had a  more disgusting thing in this house in all of my life. :(

holy smokes. as i'm sitting here typing to you, daydra comes trotting back in from outside....taylor sd, "MOM HERE's THE REST OF THE BIRD!!" OH MY HEAVENSTOBETSY!!! THERE IT WAS. ON MY LIVING ROOM CARPET. i stand corrected. since the body was bigger, and headless to boot, THAT was the most disgusting thing that ever entered this house. :(  
nothing like a superlative to bring on a new challenge. :(

hmmm..maybe if i say "i'm the richest i've ever been in my whole life!".... ??? :)

veteran's day

wow. i just came back from a very stirring veteran's day assembly at the palladium. it was phenomenal. the elementary schools were dressed mostly in red, some white, and some blue. the songs that they sung made me cry. esp the last one. the high school band played the theme songs from each branch of the military. they were well represented. high school students in their sunday clothes escorted the veterans to their seats at the start of the program. a high schooler played taps on his trumpet. i have never felt the power of that emotion in this type of memorial and the tears just spilled over. i'm so grateful to  live in this country. and for the men and women who have, do, and will fight to protect our freedoms. :) GOD BLESS AMERICA!!

30 days? i spoke too soon...

haha...so much for being organized and writing 30 thankful things... that would be one each day...and it's been 16 days since i wrote that...if i remember correctly. so i need to let you know 16 things i'm thankful for....

1- that i was born to honest, hard-working, service oriented non-hypocritical parents. if there's one thing that i've noticed as i've gotten older , it's that my parents live what they teach. they are in no way hypocritical. and in this world, that's a rare commodity.

2- that i'm still married. not that i'm setting any records, but as far as i know, he's still happy with me. :) and THAT might be a record

3- that we have healthy bodies. i have friends and family members who have struggled w/health problems their entire lives. i have been blessed to not have had to deal w/any chronic or life-altering issues. neither have any members of my immediate family. or rather, those i've been caretaker of. and that's a huge blessing...

4- this goes hand in hand w/the healthy bodies. but it's really something i'm grateful for.  i love the feeling of falling asleep when i'm tired. i love the feeling of peeing when i have to go really bad. what an awesome relief. i love the feeling of hugging and kissing eric. my goodness he just feels good. i love the feeling of sweating when i'm exercising. these and so many things, i just love. :) hot showers, full belly, good diarrhea run after hogging like a pig.

and again, i'll have to finish this later...