odors

i am convinced that there is no worse smell on the planet than that of a silent doggy fart. i don't care what skunk has rolled in what....it just can't compete. i decided that while i was trying to eat my dinner tonight. leftover homemade enchilladas. i was sucking on a bite to really savor the melted cheese and spice mix when lo-and-behold my nose hairs started to curl. sure enough, at the foot of my chair was one sweet little dog (whose breed won't be mentioned to protect his identity) with big dark eyes begging for a bite. if i were pregnant, i would have given it to him. involuntarily, and already chewed. but since i'm premenopausal and unlikely to have any more fertile eggs left to spawn, i gagged my food down and shewed him away. but it leads me to this thought:
is there really ANYTHING more vomit-inducing than a dog fart?

staying at home

i'm a stay-at-home mom. finally. i am 45 yrs old, and have FINALLY realized the dream i've had since i was born. i'm sure of it. i never saw myself doing anything BUT taking care of a husband and kids. even when i WAS a kid. i just didn't know it then. but i DID know i loved the smell of homemade bread. and that i prefer a clean house over an unkempt one.

however, i am on the verge of tears. why is that?? another hour and a half shredding zucchini, mixing up zucchini bread, --- i even used whole wheat flour, for pete's sake--- and the stinkin' stuff burned. not bcs i forgot abt it. not bcs i even let it overcook, but bcs the gas oven HATES me. i realize that makes me sound extremely paranoid, but at that risk, i say it. loud and clear. it HATES me. i cannot for the life of me get the oven to bake at a temperature that can turn out a yummy loaf of bread. or even an entire pan of cookies golden like they're supposed to be. and to make matters worse, my intentions were good. i had "intended" to take these four small loaves to my new "friends". yes, i'm trying really hard to reach out in this neighborhood. to make friends and feel like i actually belong.

so, here i sit. the smell of burnt bread still permeating the otherwise-as-clean-as-it-can-be house. :( holding back tears....